In this episode, we dive into the GUEST LIST. Do you need to cut the Guest List? How? How many guests is too much? Should you let mom create her own list? How to narrow down who is getting invited to your wedding and how to organize it. This is a tricky process and we offer our personal and professional advice on how to navigate it.
Big Take Aways
We are big proponents of a two-part organization process. First, both partners need to write down everyone they want to invite, and then you divide those lists into A and B lists. Compare notes and go from there. Ok, so it’s a three or four part process, but still, we break it down for you.
Personal moment alert! Christy shares her biggest regret planning her own wedding 8 years ago. Hint: It had to do with the guestlist!
The guest list can be the most challenging part of the wedding planning process for some couples. We suggest creating your guest list together during the very first phase of the wedding planning process. Take into consideration the size of your budget and the physical constraints of your venue.
Like everything else with wedding planning, you need to compromise. If you want a VERY expensive reception meal and the top tier bar package, you will likely need to invite fewer guests. How do you cross people off the invite list? This is the hard part. One rule of thumb and questions to ask yourself: Have you seen this person in the last year? Are you likely to see them in the year following your wedding?
Do you have to include a ‘Plus One’ on your invitations? Michelle and Christy discuss the options here. Our opinion? Yes, yes you do. (For the most part…)
Destination weddings! They’re a little different when it comes to your guest list. Typically, you’ll invite fewer people, and fewer people will RSVP with a yes. The earlier you get out your Save The Date, the better. You’re requesting more from your guests with a destination wedding…they need to plan ahead!
Links we referenced
Here’s a blog post on the Allure Consulting site that breaks down the budget and guest list – including Michelle’s advice for the A and B list: http://www.allureconsulting.com/allure-wedding-consulting-blog/category/how-much-should-i-budget-for-my-wedding
“7 years later, I definitely think we made some wrong decisions. Friends of mine, friendships that have lasted much past the wedding, that I didn’t invite…where I think we went wrong is that we should have made room, or put it on a credit card, to invite people who were so special to me and that weren’t at my wedding.” –Christy, on her own wedding planning regrets
“I’ve done a Hindu wedding where the bride and groom didn’t have any say in their wedding, but that’s the cultural norm and the couple was ok with that…but typically, for the majority of our weddings, the couple is paying for most of the wedding. So the guest list should ultimately be up to the couple getting married.” – Michelle, on the proportion of guests the parents typically invite
“You can’t make everybody happy! And you want to please your future-mother-in-law and you don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. But when it comes down to it, you don’t want to regret anything. And people will get over it.” -Michelle
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Let us know if you have any questions you need answered on the show or if you want to share your own wedding planning experiences!