#67 The Second Time Around

About This Episode

Second time’s a charm! Our dear friend, Trisha Dean, shares her experience as she is in the middle of planning a big wedding. It’s her second big wedding to plan, and Michelle was her wedding planner for the first one!

Trisha tells us all about planning a second wedding. It’s a first however for her fiance and it’s a destination wedding to boot! Trisha addresses how she has compromised along the way, how she has thrown out the ‘rules’ and why she is looking forward to her wedding day, especially this second time around.

Big Takeaways
There were lessons learned the first time around, and one of them was putting importance on how you want your wedding weekend to be - like how you want to experience the city, your wedding day and the day before and after, how you want your guests to feel being a part of everything...this is something that Trisha and Sutton put a lot of weight on. The weekend will be an experience for the guests...their best friends and family members will have a truly memorable weekend.

The gown. Can a bride wear white the second time around? Hell yes! Are princess ball gowns pasé if you’re over 30 years old? Hell no! Just because you’ve been a bride before, that doesn’t mean you are any less of a bride now. Trisha tried on A LOT of dresses. She wants to feel and look amazing - of course!

Advice:
Get a videographer - Trisha is SO glad she splurged on this for her first wedding and the video is one of her very favorite keepsakes (yes, even though the marriage didn’t last forever). She made sure to get one for her second wedding as well.
Take your time. Especially if there are kids involved. You’ve already done this once, what’s the rush this time? If you feel like you are rushing, ask yourself why. Introspection is key here - don’t do anything unless you can do it with confidence, together. Trisha thinks you need a year to plan a wedding if you are going to be picky about wedding details and elements.
Budgeting is all about compromise. Trisha initially wanted a smaller, simple wedding, largely in part to her knowledge of how much this all costs. But when Sutton wanted to have a big wedding and invite many of his friends, Trisha didn’t question him. She knew how important it was to him, so blowing the budget up was a no-brainer. No Regrets!
Including the kids: As far as Trisha is concerned, this wedding belongs to her daughter just as much as it’s hers.
Do whatever makes you happy! Trisha and Sutton scrapped all the pre-wedding stuff and instead are having a three day long weekend for their destination wedding. And instead of having designated bridesmaids and groomsmen, they are asking specific people to stay in the venue with them to party all weekend as VIPs. No matching bridesmaid’s dresses for this wedding!

Links we referenced
Wedding Website Trisha loves: Bliss and Bone - https://blissandbone.com

Quotes
“After your divorce, did you feel like you would get married again?” - Michelle, to Trisha

“I think divorce is a horrible, hard thing. But I came out on the other side and I was just very, very content.” - Trisha, bottom line

“I was like give me the stats: What does he look like? How old is he? Does he have a job? Does he live with his mom? Has he ever been in jail? All the usual questions any normal girlfriend would ask.” - Christy, on Trisha’s unicorn fiance

“We freaking adore each other. We know we want to be together. But there was no need to rush into anything.” - Trisha, on taking her time

“When you’re older, you don’t hesitate to say NO to what you don’t want.” - Trisha

“One of my girlfriends came up to me and said, you cannot get a poofy dress. And I was like, bitch, I can get whatever I want!” - Trisha, on wedding dress shopping

“You can write your own rulebooks...and that’s what really defines you as a couple.” - Trisha, with advice for other second-time-brides

“Trust and let go.” - Trisha, on working with her vendors

Get In Touch
Let us know if you have any questions you need answered on the show or if you want to share your own wedding planning experiences!
TWITTER: @TBWPpodcast
EMAIL: thebigweddingplanningpodcast@gmail.com